Nesquik

You know there are some things that you think just can't possibly fail. Like that movie Lars and the real girl. That thing should've practically written itself. Dude buys doll, people make fun of him, dude persists with doll, dude bones doll, dude marries doll in some state that has just passed a law that says its okay to marry a doll, dude meets a real girl, dude realises that the doll talked a lot less and decides to stick it out with her. Could've been the greatest comedy of all time. Probably wouldn't have won an Oscar or anything but either did Happy Gilmore - and we all know the people at the academy awards have been regretting that oversight for sometime. Instead they make some bullshit religious "serious" movie that just wouldn't ever end. Nesquik is such a terrific drink, yet this tastes like what Ryan Goslings bedroom would've smelt like in that crappy film, like stale Christian semen. My dog wouldn't even eat this cereal and i've seen her eat her own shit. It doesn't even make the milk go nice and chocolate like. I don't think the people at Nestle even ran this cereal by Quicky, the Nesquik bunny. I fail to believe he'd endorse such an awful product.

0 stars.